pretty exciting in 2007!

2007 holds great promises (we think, must be an optimist!), though still in a scared shitless mode as of the moment (really, must be an optimist!)…

Going to be a Daddy soon! Hahaha!!!
Goodbye Bachelorhood…
Hello Mommy and Baby!
shucks… God Bless thy Soul…

— so, goodnight girls…

          <30>

Friday, January 05, 2007

Love Comes In Spurts!!!

Oh Yeah! Oh Yeah!

building a platonic relationship after a break up is impossible. The memories will still linger on and continuous communication (not to mention that you’re still seeing each other) will be like adding lemons to an already bleeding wound…

and of course it’s bullshit!

Friday, June 02, 2006 

gimme gimme yer punchdrunk kiss…

It was meant to be…

Those are the only words I could ever think of right now.
 
Six years…

a life of love, passion, and dreams
a communion of souls,
of lives intertwined with the
immense background of unknown.
you goaded me into your
graces as i
swam into the infinite
bliss
of your sweet tender kiss…

i have only my life to offer,
only this, and nothing else…

(attempt at poetry for our 6th year anniversary circa 2004)
Thursday, March 30, 2006

mumblings

i am losing it.

I am now lost in a labyrinth; forever finding self in the same spot, same situation, same characters but different faces. It’s like a big orgy or party, all that happens just passes by like a blur: and you only get a lousy hang over after.

Past a quarter century nearing (writing) thirty.

Life’s fast becoming a dog life with everyday humdrum drearies juxtaposed with the sweltering heat, low salary, a-slave-like-work schedule, insomnia, and unconsummated fantasies. It is easy to pass up as normal — as long as you can keep your farts in.

That’s how a dear friend summed his new dictum: Never hold your farts in. It travels up your spine on to your brain, resulting to shitty ideas.

Right.

I remembered Milan Kundera’s “Unbearable Lightness of Being.” The way he dissected Nietzsche’s Eternal Return was pretty enlightening, considering the emotional quagmire I am in now; either buries me or uplifts me.

First “The myth of eternal return states that a life which disappears once and for all, which does not return, is like a shadow, without weight, dead in advance, and whether it was horrible, beautiful, or sublime, its horror, sublimity, and beauty mean nothing.”

And…

“If every second of our lives recurs an infinite number of times, we are nailed to eternity as Jesus Christ was nailed to the cross. It is a terrifying prospect. In the world of eternal return the weight of unbearable responsibility lies heavy on every move we make. That is why Nietzsche called the idea of eternal return the heaviest of burdens (das schwerste Gewicht).”*

Remembering how Tomas was where in the beginning of the story, I can’t help but think was he so right at that moment. He has all the reason to be wrong or right, whatever he would have decided later on. He has the benefit of the first choice. It’s like the old adage “Cross the bridge when you get there.”

Well I did crossed bridges, went back (even slept on the bridge)…

Haha!

So if I am to be put in Tomas shoes, it will be like the third or fourth time now; always getting in circles, never knowing where to go. It’s like tasting the apple knowing what it will taste like and still pondering on the next time how will it taste like.

I should stop right now before somebody kills me.

*From Milan Kundera’s Unbearable Lightness of Being.

Wednesday, March 29, 2006